So after you get your baggage at the Detroit airport, you
have to go up a series of escalators to get to a bridge that takes you to the
area where the rental car shuttle buses pick up and drop off. This is nothing
new to me, because I’ve made this walk about a million times, or so it seems
anyway, but this time things didn’t work out quite right.
Now you have to sort of get this picture into your head
before you can really “see” the event I’m about to describe. I have a HUGE
suitcase because let’s face it, I gotta carry enough clothes, shoes, makeup,
and stuff for two people for a week. I also have to take a large rolling
toolbox with me that carries all of my tools and spare components in it. Then,
just to top it all off, I also have a backpack with my laptop, notebooks, kindle,
GPS, and a good 25 pounds of assorted stuff in it. So, there I am, pushing my
tool box in front of me and pulling my huge suitcase behind me as I head up the
fairly narrow escalator. When I got the end of the escalator, I pushed the tool
box forward and stepped off of the escalator just as I always have.
Well, that was the plan anyway, but it didn’t quite work out
that way. . .
At the end of the escalator I pushed the tool box forward
and it went absolutely nowhere – it simply stopped at the end, trapping me
behind it on the still moving escalator. Realizing that the escalator was
moving me, and the people behind me, toward the now blocked exit, I reached out
my foot and shoved the box as hard as I could . . . and still the damn thing
wouldn’t budge. Now things are really getting exciting, because the box is
blocking the narrow exit of the escalator, the escalator is still happily
moving me and everyone behind me toward the blockage, I’m off balance because I’ve
got one foot desperately trying to shove the tool box forward, and I just ran
out of room. You know, I would have paid good money to have someone filming or
taking pictures when I was left with no choice but to leap over the toolbox,
while wearing a dress and four inch stiletto sandals! Once on the other side of
the tool box and now looking down the escalator at all of the people that are
about to run into my little road block, I grabbed it with both hands and yanked
it as hard as I could. At last, the tool box came free and went sliding about
ten feet across the floor, along with the backpack that had been sitting on top
of it. With the tool box now out of the way, my suitcase was free to tip over, and
so I reached out and snatched it out of the way just as the next person behind
me got to the top of the escalator. Horribly embarrassed, I made my way from
bag to bag, picking them up and apologizing to the folks behind me that had
come within seconds of also having to jump over my baggage. The man that was
behind me helped me grab my things and even offered to take one of the bags up
the next escalator for me. The woman that was right behind him just gave me this
horrible “You are SUCH a loser” look that it made me want to wilt and die on
the spot.
When I got to the rental car lot and stepped off of the bus,
I was making my way to the board where they display your name and the space
where your car is located, when an Avis employee walked up to me.
“Your car is in space G11 ma’am” he told me with a smile
“Thank you!” I replied, and then turned to find the space
when it struck me. He hadn’t asked for my name or anything, and yet knew which
car was mine. Now despite the show I had put on at the escalator earlier, I am
not an idiot, and so it doesn’t surprise me that he recognized the cross
dresser that has done so much business there, but the fact that he remembered the
name that went with the cross dresser was pretty impressive. I was still thinking
of this when I handed my contract and drivers license to the female guard at
the gate.
“Well look at you!” she said as she compared the two
documents. “Looking all pretty and everything!”
“Awe, thanks!” I replied. And then things got a little weird
as she continued to gush
“You are REALLY pretty, and wearing your pretty little dress
and everything. You make me think of Rupaul – he is so gorgeous!”
“He IS pretty, isn’t he? Yeah, but I’m nowhere near being in
his league!”
“Have you seen his show before? Rupaul’s Drag Race?” she
asked.
“You know, believe it or not, I’ve never seen it!”
“Well you should check it out!” she said, and then continued
to just stare at me without handing me my things back. “You just look so cute
with your perfect hair and pretty dress!”
“Thank you . . . “ I told her again, trying to give her a
smile, but starting to get distinctly uncomfortable.
I wonder if she realizes that she ran a serious risk of
offending me? Nothing against RuPaul, but your average TG out and about and living
their life, isn’t necessarily going to like being compared to a self-proclaimed
drag queen, even if we are talking
about a world famous and pretty one. Still, I like to take into account what someone’s
intent is, and she was trying to be
nice.
I just love hearing about your travels! If you cross-dress long enough, disasters, or near disasters, will surely happen. lol
ReplyDeleteWell, you SHOULD consider entering RPDR. After all drag is about entertainment. And your latest episode was entertaining. :)
ReplyDeleteYour travel stories are great, they make you feel as if you are there. You always have different outfits on and look great, very ladylike. That WAS a kodak moment, kinda like ninja engineer. Happy trails!
ReplyDeletei am not even going to comment on your experience except WOW!
ReplyDeleteon a happier note though i not only like the length of your dress - shows great leg mussel :-) but i love the back round setting as well. nice fireplace and there is that pretty little victorian heart occasional chair as well.
thank you for shareing.
I have the film of this incident and will NOT put it on youtube for 100 billion dollars in unmarked non-sequential small bills to be delivered to...
ReplyDelete;)
It was bound to happen. I am always looking for you on the Denny's - Starbucks stop on the way to the AB-Airport
ReplyDelete@Sophie - At that price, you can go ahead and post it. Besides, I wanna see it my damn self!
ReplyDelete@Anonymous - I'm at that Dennys probably every third or fourth trip. LOL
Kimberly -
ReplyDeleteI have been reading your site for the last few months and until you mentioned the size 10 shoes I didn't realize why you would ever have an issue with passing. I too have size ten clodhoppers, and now realize that you are not as tiny and perfect as you appear in your pictures. Your face is gorgeous and your hair and outfits are always so classy and well presented. With that smile you should never doubt yourself. You look great. Hugs - Dee
Some people are so DUMB! They don't know the differents between Drag Queen and TG!
ReplyDeleteYea, it could be offensive! Considering the person,Yea we'll let it slide! WOW!
FYI: just found Transgender Airport Tips seems to be about European travel but interesting read it's at samanthatgirl@blogspot.com (I found it on Tcentral)
ReplyDeleteCool! I'll take a look Mrslickiv6. :)
ReplyDelete