Wow, I am so tired. I think my no sleep, and always on the go last couple of weeks is catching up with me, ‘cause I am just plain tired. This weeks trip was to provide training and do some maintenance on some of our equipment at the University of Cincinnati. My flight didn’t leave until 10AM, so at least this time I didn’t have to get up at 3AM. I wore a new skirt I had bought a month or so ago.
You could call this skirt a “Stealth Bad Girl” skirt, because it looks quite prim and proper on the hanger, and even on me while I’m standing. Sitting down however is a whole different ball of wax. This skirt has slits in both, the front and the back, and when you sit, the slit in the front pulls open to show a great deal more of my legs than I am comfortable with. I spent my entire day tugging it down and closed again. Other than that, I thought it was cute enough. I think I’ll keep it, but reserve it for going out in the evening when I want to be a little sexy, not for everyday wear.
Today was a “no confidence” day – I just felt like I was ugly and like everyone seeing me would know exactly what I was. Even before I left the house, I was thinking about taking a shower and going male, but there wasn’t time. I spent the entire day feeling like a man in a skirt, and feeling like people were staring at me. Oh well . . .
So, on this day where I feel a serious lack of confidence, I arrive in Cincinnati . . . and my luggage doesn’t. . . .
With all of the travel I do, this is only the third time my baggage has not arrived. Twice I was flying US Airways (including this trip), and once on a United flight. At least when United blew it, they could tell me where my bags were. They had sent them on a tour of the South Eastern US when I needed them in New York state, but at least they KNEW where the bags were. Both times with US Airways, they could not tell me anything about my bags. They had no idea if they had ever left Austin, and of course had no idea where they were. Now having slammed them for that, I would have to admit that the gentlemen helping me was very friendly, concerned, and professional, and did his very best. He called me several times to let me know what the status was, called me when they found them, and called me when they were on a truck to be delivered. So yeah, they lost them, but they bent over backwards to find them and get them to me, and they did it with a friendly and professional attitude. Considering that they were dealing with a cross dresser, something that they probably don’t encounter every day, I give them an A+.
I arrived at the hotel, still feeling ugly and unpassable, more than a little tired from a long day, and very stressed over the entire luggage thing. Moving more or less on auto pilot, I approached the front desk and realize that the two women working the counter are absolutely stunning. They were both picture perfect Barbie Doll blondes, with the faces and figures of models or movies stars. For just a moment, I feel an almost physical pain in my chest, kind of a longing that is hard to describe. Here I felt like an ugly and tired old man in a skirt, and I was speaking with the exact opposite - a drop dead gorgeous young lady. I know it makes no sense to say you miss something you never had, but sometimes I sort of feel like I was robbed, like I should have had a life like hers, like it’s just not fair that I didn’t get it. I know it'snot rational, and that there’s nothing redeeming about envy, but there you have it.
Despite her young years, the goddess that took care of me never once hesitated. She gave me a huge smile and treated me as she would have treated any woman, and shortly I was on the way to my room. So there I am in my hotel room, dressed entirely as a female, I don’t have a stitch of male clothing, don’t know if my luggage will be found or not, and I’ve got to go to work tomorrow morning.
Nothing else for it I guess, and in a complete turn about from the normal state of affairs, Kimberly went shopping for Matthew! Eighty dollars later, I left Target with a complete male outfit, grumbling to myself the entire time that this money would have bought a fairly good pair of heels! Still wearing my stealth bad girl skirt, I stopped into a Italian restaurant called “Carlos” and had dinner. Again, I felt like everyone that interacted with me knew instantly what I was, but I was just too damn tired to care.After dinner, I had sort of caught my second wind, and decided to head to a club called “On Broadway” that I’d found Online. It was supposed to do karaoke Monday nights, and now that I had male clothing for my work day I was starting to relax a little, so I gave it a shot. I arrived at about 9PM and was treated like gold. The bartender and a couple of customers struck up conversations with me. The only down side is that the karaoke didn’t start until “10’ish” which means more like 1030PM, and I just wasn’t up to hanging that late tonight, and so I returned to the hotel. Around 230AM I got the call that my bags had been delivered to the hotel. Wow, I could have saved my eighty dollars if I'd just waited, but I just couldn’t afford to run the risk.
The next day was a pretty exhausting one as well. I was here to work on our Residual Gas Analyzers (Mass Spectroscope), and while I was once pretty good with these things, I haven’t actually laid hands on one in years. This left me more than a little nervous going into this. When I arrived and was escorted into their lab, I was gratified to see equipment from my company everywhere. Their labs were like show cases for my company, with our products on every shelf, bench, and system I could see. With the economy being what it is these days, it’s nice to see to see this. I was able to repair both of their systems, upgrade their software, provide training on how to use it, and also addressed a whole host of other problems they were having. I gave them three hours of my time for free, because lets face it, with our products everywhere, they had clearly done well by my company and so I went the extra mile for them. By the time I headed back to the hotel, it was 6PM, I had 40 minutes of driving ahead of me, and I was just plain tired. When I checked and found that my flight home left at 630AM, I decided then and there that Kimberly was not coming out to play tonight. I took some pics of the hotel area for my blog and then asked the blonde super models at the counter if I might take their picture for my blog as well. They both looked very embarrassed and told me they would prefer not. I was too tired to try to charm them in to it, and so feeling disappointed, I returned to my room. I know that even in boy mode, sometimes I must give off signals that say “Hey, I’m different”, and so between that and my being so damned tired, I wonder if I just came off to the girls at the counter as creepy? Great – half the time I’m a cross dresser, and the other half of the time I’m creepy . . . I wonder if I should have just taken their picture with out asking, but somehow it just seemed rude. . .