December 22, 2007 - I wanna go home!

So my latest trip was to Detroit on Sunday 16 Dec where I planned to work with my customer on the following Monday morning, then get on a plane for Indianapolis that evening to work with a customer there. My trip to Detroit was supposed to be about 6 hours long, giving me all day Sunday to play. For that matter, I had seriously considered flying "dressed" for the first time since it was a short flight and I didn't have to see the customer until the following day. Luckily for me, my wife talked me out of flying dressed because the flight to Detroit turned into a nightmare of canceled flights, re-routing, and delays. The trip that was supposed to take around 6 hours took over 21 hours. Had I flown dressed, the cat would have been outta the bag after about 12 hours when the beard would have started showing!

So they boarded us onto the plane from Atlanta to Detroit, let us get all seated and belted in, and then told us the flight was canceled due to weather.
Then they set me up on a later flight - that was canceled.
They offered to fly me into Grand Rapids, around 100 miles North of Detroit, but I figured if the weather was so bad that a huge airport like Detroit had to close, then I darn sure didn't want to be driving 100 miles in it.Eventually they rerouted me through Memphis and then onto Detroit. The flight to Memphis was then delayed so that I had to run like hell for the connection and I just barely caught the connection.

I just caught the connection.
My suitcase caught the connection.
My tool box did not make the connection. #%$*#~!!!!

By the time I make the lost baggage claim, get the rental car, and drive 40 miles north on the ice and snow, it's about 1AM when I get to bed. At 5AM the airline calls to tell me my tool box has been delivered to the hotel!

The view from my hotel room in Troy MI

Monday I got the Detroit job done and moved on to Indianapolis for the next service call.

Shot from the gate at the Detroit Airport on the way to Indianapolis

No problems this flight but apparently I ate something I shouldn't have and got food poisoning. Tuesday I spent with bad stomach cramps and. . . well. . . no delicate way to say this . . the "runs" . . . and I had them BAD. I didn't feel too bad other than that, I just couldn't get more than a yard from the bathroom. This was a bit uncomfortable as my customer was a 40 minute drive from my hotel.

Taken on the drive from Indianapolis to Columbus Indiana

Tuesday night when I got back to the hotel from my customer I had to go to the bathroom VERY bad, so I grabbed my laptop, locked the car, and ran like hell for the room!I was supposed to go out with Gina that night, but I decided to throw in the towel and called her to explain that I just couldn't do it. I then crawled into bed where I would sleep for about an hour and half, run for the bathroom, then go back to sleep for two hours, etc.

The following morning when I got to my rental car to make the drive back down to my customer, I discovered that in my haste to get to my room the night before, I had left my GPS hanging on the windshield. Yup, you guessed it, some no good, low life, scum sucking, son of a dog busted out my drivers window and stole my brand new, less than a week old GPS unit.  

What a new GPS unit looks like when you leave it on the window over night at a hotel

I know that a $250 GPS isn't worth someone's life, but right then I would cheerfully murder the guy if I could get my hands on him. The rental car company brought me out a new car, I bought another GPS, and went back to work.


That night I met Jenny for dinner.

Going to dinner with Jenny Wed night

I'm not sure how much Jenny would be comfortable with my speaking about here so I wont tell you much about her other than the fact that she was a very nice person and it was a pleasant evening. Still didn't feel very good and so called it a night after dinner and went to bed.
Fortunately the next day I felt a LOT better and went got to hang out with Gina again.

Going to dinner and The Metro with Gina Thur night

We went to English Ivy's for dinner as usual, and then went to The Metro for drinks and karaoke The last time I went to karaoke there it was awesome. this time it was kind of sad in comparison. I also found myself choking on the smoke in the place - I don't remember it being so bad the last time. Now my clothes and hair reek of cigarette smoke! :-(

Friday I woke up at about 3AM to discover that what ever it is I had, food poisoning or something else, it had NOT left me after all. I spent the entire trip home running from bathroom to bathroom. Pretty sure this trip goes down in history as my very worst ever and I just couldn't wait for it to end! The good news is I lost about five pounds and now weigh 145!
Darn shame it will be temporary!

December 08, 2007 - Lexington Kentucky

This weeks trip was to Lexington Kentucky. I searched the Internet for things to do here and about all I could find was horses, horses, and more horses. :-)
Well, I guess I'll just have to go shopping! I found the Fayette Mall and took a walk through it.

I found a few things I liked, but nothing I couldn't live with out. The good news is, as far as I could tell no one made me, so life was good.
After the comment I received at the Glamor Boutique, I decided to try hip pads. The off the shelf apparel with hip pads incorporated just didn't seem to look right on me. Either I looked like I had dinner plates on my hips, or tennis balls - no happy medium, so I made my own.

I think they DO help my appearance but they are a pain in the butt! Have to wear a girdle to hold them in place, and lord help you if you have to go potty, because getting them back in the right place takes a bit of effort! Do you think they help my look enough to be worth the hassle?
Did my window shopping and then decided to hit up "Mia's" for dinner. Mia's is a small "friendly" bar that also serves food, and I've got to tell you, it was a darn good meal! I ordered a long island Iced Tea and darn near fell off my stool when I took my first drink of it. They don't hold back the alcohol there!
It seems like there were several small groups, all doing their own thing, and I sat at the bar pretty well bored outta my mind. Spoke with the bartender a bit - it turns out we were both into the "Tin Man" series currently airing on Sci Fi. She turned the TV on to watch it, but had to use closed captioning which makes for a bit of frustration. I'd been there for a little over an hour when two ladies sat next to me and I struck up a conversation with the one closest to me - Sharon. Turns out that she is from Texas, only a couple of hours from where I live. We talked a long time. She and her wife (get a grip, this WAS a lesbian bar!) manage the club down the street "Club 141/Z1" I think it is. She was a very nice person and I really enjoyed talking to her! The club they manage was not open on Tuesday nights, so I think I'll have to try and look them up when / if I get back there.

Got a call from Beth - turns out that she can get out! 
Beth is gorgeous and has a little bitty figure I'd kill for. I asked her if she did marathons and ate only rabbit food - she assures me she isn't an exercise fiend and eats like a horse. I'm pretty sure I hate her. Just teasing - Beth is a VERY nice person and I wouldn't hesitate if you get the chance to meet her!  My only regret is that with her work schedule, and my having to catch a plane in the morning, it seemed that she had just got there when I had to leave. With any luck, we will have more time if I get back again.

November 30, 2007 - It DOES get better!

Well everyone, I spoke to my wife some more about this tonight. She is honestly not upset, and trust me, if she was upset she WOULD let me know!The funny thing is that she said much the same thing that many of you have said here "Screw 'em if they have a problem!"

As my only pain was thinking that I had hurt my wife (however indirectly) I'm OK now. If she's not hurt, then I'm not. I honestly couldn't care less what these people think or know as long as they don't hurt my wife because of it.

I thank you all for your genuine concern. If y'all are "That kind of people" then I'm OK with that and proud to be a part of it.

Hugs from Texas!

November 29, 2007 - It Gets Even Better - NOT

As I recently posted, we found out Thanksgiving day that my Mother in law apparently knows about me and has been kind enough to share that with at least some of my wife's family. (Thanks Mom, love ya'! Really! Mean it!)
Well today it got even better. . .

My wife works at the same company I do so when I'm in town, we drive to work and back together. Today she let me know that one of the other ladies at our office was asked not to invite my wife and I to her "couples" baby shower. And I quote "I don't wont those kind of people around".

For this to make sense, you have to know that a woman who I now fondly think of as "Witch" used to work for my company, found out about me, and was completely repelled by it. Witch told the same woman who shared the "I don't wont those kind of people around" comment with us more than a year ago. It now appears that she told more people.

So way cool! My wife loves me for 20 years and gives me two wonderful children. I repay her by repelling her family and ruining any chance she has to make normal friends at work. . .

When we were speaking about it at dinner tonight, and it was all I could do to keep from crying, she told me "I know it makes you happy and I wont ask you to stop, but it hasn't been good for me."
Wow, I feel pretty much like the lowest thing on the planet right now.

November 26, 2007 - I had a dream

Many years I ago I had a very intense and realistic dream. It was a very simple dream, and I'd be surprised if anyone who is NOT transgender would understand why I found it to be so powerful and emotional.
I was a woman, in front of a mirror, brushing my hair. I was not a beauty queen in this dream, nor a princess, a "hotty", or a sex goddess. I was just a woman, brushing my hair. Told you it was simple.

For all of its apparent simplicity, it was one of those dreams that seems so real, feels so real, that it takes a moment upon waking to realize that it was . . . just . . . . a dream. When I did wake up enough to know it was just a dream, and that I most certainly was not a woman doing this most mundane thing, I felt tears running down my face.
This dream was the inspiration for this drawing.

November 23, 2007 - My mother-in-law has been telling tales

Thanksgiving night we went to San Antonio to spend the holiday with my wife's aunt and uncle. These are good folks that have retired from the army and settled down about three hours south of us here in Texas. As it always does at some point or other, the conversation eventually came around to my wife's mother. She went through a divorce about a decade ago and it really tore up her life so she moved in with us for a while. It ended somewhat badly and more or less my wife asked her to leave. So anyway, while we were talking about my mother in law, my wife's Aunt sort of let a comment slip out.
"I don't believe a thing she says about you," said my wife's aunt.
Hmm . . . I'm a bit over 40 and these days I don't rattle easily, so I smiled and calmly asked her what my mother in law had told her about me.
"I'm not gonna say. Besides your too much a man for that and I don't believe a word of it."
I tried a little bit more but for some time she refused to elaborate, but at least two more times she referred to this, so it was clear she was either very concerned about it or fishing.
I waited until we had a moment with the children out of the room and then I pushed her for more info and at last she came out with it.
"She said you were a cross dresser. I don't believe it. Besides, who cares what you and your wife do in your own bedroom?"
I glanced at my wife, looking for some indication of how she would feel if I were to launch into a discussion about it, and I found her very slightly shaking her head "no". After 20 years of marriage, this glance back and forth was an entire conversation. I had asked my wife if it was all right for me to talk to them about it and my wife had asked me not to.
She never actually asked if I was or not, and given my wife's discomfort, I neither confirmed or denied it. My own warped sense of pride, integrity, and honor would not allow me to lie about it. Had she point blank asked me, I would have told her the truth.
Her aunts words "I don't care what you two do in your room" sort of bugs me. Now they have this vision of me like the rocky horror picture show, some guy in 9 inch heels and fishnets prancing around a room. It gives me the creeps that this is probably what they think a cross dresser is, what I am. I want to talk to them, tell them what it really is, what it really means to me, but my wife has asked me not to speak to them about it or explain it. I hate it but I will honor her wishes. When you have a wife that accepts this of you, you have to respect her wishes sometimes and put her comfort level above your own.
If you have read my story from one of my first blogs, you know cross dressing is so much more for me than the something "you two do in the bedroom" and I just hate it that this is the picture they are left with.
On the way home we talked about it and I agreed I would not discuss it unless I was specifically asked.
We had not even been aware my mother in law knew of this. We knew she couldn't possibly keep a secret like this and so we did not share it with her, nor had I gone out the entire year she lived with us, so I know she has not seen me. My best guess is she was snooping through our room and closet when we were out to work and she is putting two and two together.
Knowing that she has been telling people this has allowed another little piece of the puzzle to fall into place. A week ago my sister in law brought her two children over and stayed the night with us. At least half a dozen times she referred to me as "she" or "her". I had wondered if she had figured it out then. Knowing that her mother shared this with my wife's Aunt and Uncle, I think it's certain she has shared it with my wife's sister, and probably her entire family. I don't know if this has yet occured to my wife. My sister in law and her husband live in another small town in Texas. While very good people in my opinion, they are NOT the type to accept this sort of thing well. These are the type of folks that say "go get a rope" if they were to see a cross dresser.
The only feeling I have about all of this is sorrow for my poor wife. I am not ashamed of what I am and it doesn't bother me much if someone knows, but my wife has lost a good friend when the womans husband found out about me, and now my wife's entire family almost certainly knows. Once again I have managed to hurt my wife, the lovely little girl that saved my life 20 years ago when she had the courage to say "I love you too". Once again, I've brought pain to the lovely woman that has given me two beautiful children, and two decades of love.
Most of the time I'm OK with it, but sometimes being TG really sucks . . .

October 30, 2007- Sally, Rita, and the Sisters of Boston

So now I’m in Boston! I got there Saturday night and went out with the Sisters of Boston .


Sally came and picked me up and we went to dinner at a small Italian place.
It was so funny – we must have been the first TGirls they have ever had, or at the very least it must be a rare event. You could see the hostess do a double take but she recovered well. About five minutes later, while Sally and I were going over the menu I saw the hostess peek around the corner and point us out to another girl. When I glanced up they were suddenly “busy “.
After dinner we moved on to pick up Dina (the lady in the middle in the pic at right)


I was told that Dina had gone shopping "dressed" for the first time the night before. Hard to believe – she looks so perfect. She is small and looked 100% "real" to me. If I looked like that I would never go back to boy mode. We went to the mall because she had to return something she had purchased the night before. As we passed a couple of guys in their early 20’s, one of them let out quite the theatrical laugh that was clearly intended to mock us. I was out and pretty, with two other pretty ladies and having a great time and I wasn’t about to let some punk bother me, so we just kept walking.

After we did a little shopping, we moved on to the Randolph Country Club to join the Halloween party, already in progress. As I walked into the club, Rita walked up and introduced herself to me. She and I are connected on yahoo 360 but I had failed to recognize her. She had her first make over that night and was so excited! At least half a dozen times that night, folks that I had never met walked up to say  “Aren’t you Kim”? I felt like some sort of star or something. Isn’t the internet an odd place – so many people come to know you by reading your blog.

Sally was one of those cute ensigns from Star Trek and was cute as heck. She carried a little Tricorder that we all played with and laughed about through out the night.

There had to be at least 40 TGirls there, short ones, tall ones, skinny ones, large ones, and some were drop dead gorgeous. Sigh . . . wish I had that problem! 

 
Speaking of cute and gorgeous, here was my favorite outfit from the night:

After the club closed, seven of us went to IHOP for breakfast. We got every kind of reaction you can imagine. Some folks were tickled to death, and some just kind of stared at as. I’d say the majority of the folks were in costumes. While we sat out in the waiting area waiting for a table, a drop dead gorgeous GG walked in wearing an identical Batgirl outfit to Ashley. As you can imagine, this launched an energetic round of comparing, laughing, and amusement.
It was a fun night and I was sorry when it came to an end.
Thanks for driving and letting me join you Sally!